Her eyes said it all as she rolled the wand over my almost 20 week pregnant belly.
When she said "I'm going to grab the doctor...", my heart sank.
It was the longest ten minutes of waiting. She had already told me that both of the babies looked perfect and wonderful. Their hearts had prefect blood flowing through all 4 chambers, the ventricles of their brains so perfectly formed by our beautiful designer (God), their profiles...well, I am biased, but they were beautiful babies. What could be wrong?
To keep it short and simple, the babies were fine...my cervix is not. The doctor told me my cervix had thinned out dramatically the past week. She wasn't sure if my body was going to be able to hold onto these babies until a viable state. And until I reach 24 weeks, there is nothing they can really do to stop the contractions and thinning. I was to go home on strict bedrest and wait a few days for them to recheck it.
That appointment is in a few hours. I have spent the weekend with my head on the ground praying...all day, every day. I have been through all the emotions...angry, depression, and at moments feeling a little hopeful that "he that began a great work in me" will finish it.
I cannot believe that God would give us two miracles, then take them away. I cannot believe that His will would be for me to deliver two babies, that would take a few breaths, then die.
We need and covet ALL prayer. I am not even sure what to pray for besides the obvious miracle that only God can provide.
Can you get on your knees and fervently pray for us?