Saturday, March 14, 2009

A Little More than I deserve...

As a whole, I probably spend more time on my knees pleading to God to rid me of all my sorrows and stress. I beg Him to change any situation I am unhappy with and to rid me of all those mundane things that keep me awake at night. But, is it really possible that I am now on my knees telling God it is TOO MUCH GOODNESS?Is is really possible to be too happy or full of joy?

I am not sure where these feelings stem from. I am not trying to say that my life is perfect...but, lately I feel as though God has blessed me more than I deserve. I do not feel worthy of all the goodness in my life...but, I feel a little nervous admitting this...God might send a hail storm my way!!
Or is it possible that I have just grown so much spiritually that I have given my burdens to Him and finally decided to trust Him. Being the control-freak, obsessive compulsive person that I am, is it possible that God has finally broken me? I have prayed for this day; a day where I stop worrying so much...a day where I look at how much I have been given.
I know everyone thinks they have the best husband in the world...but, I truly am married to one of the most amazing men who ever walked this earth. Part of his beauty is that he is so humble and does not realize how great he is. He is wonderful to everyone who crosses his path and NEVER expects anything in return. Shouldn't we all aspire to be this way? 
And of course, it is no question how blessed my life is because of Ella. She has filled my heart when I did not know it was even empty. She has helped me understand life in a while new light. She makes me want to be a better person. We do not deserve her, but so grateful that God gave her to us. I will never forget the moment she first appeared in our lives 
I am so blessed in love...from my child, my husband, my really is more than I deserve. 

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