When the leaves fall...

22 weeks pregnant with our sweet twins

It was not my intention to go so long without giving an update. I'll try and be better. It has taken my body and mind a couple weeks to come to terms with my new normal and get used to being on this medicine (it keeps my resting heartrate at 120 beats per minute...so I feel like I am running a marathon even though I am laying down. It also makes my hands shake like I have Parkinson's...but, that has gotten a little better). I am mostly in good spirits though. I have a day here and there where I feel really down in the dumps, but I've had some really great days too. I have REALLY enjoyed spending more time with my dad (who has been watching Ella for me most days of the week). He'll spend the night for a few nights and has been great with Ella. Of course, he spoils her rotten...but, she is very loved. Ella is loving that someone is letting her eat doughnuts for breakfast and dessert every day of the week! This would have made the old me crazy...but, the new me is just so grateful to have people take care of her and love her.

I have been hesitant to say that this past week has been uneventful (for the most part, that is). The babies are still holding tight and seem to be growing well. I have managed to acquire enough medicine on my dresser to open a small pharmacy. I shudder to think how much this pregnancy would cost us without insurance...my medication pump alone (not including the medication itself) is $130 a DAY to rent. I'm so grateful that, so far, we have not had any problems with our insurance helping pay. Praise God that that is one stress that we have not had to endure as of yet.

I have come to terms that I'm not going to have this fairy tale pregnancy where I strut around with a glow and cute maternity dresses around the mall or park. I really don't want to look back on all this and think "that was an awful few months." Hard, yes...but such a blessing in many ways as well. I have gotten to spend so much special time with friends and family (because of my need for all day help with Ella), that I never would have gotten before bed rest. Don't get me wrong, I HATE depending on people for everything. I HATE that my time with Ella is so limited and that her whole world has been changed by my lack of being able to care for her. I cherish our time of coloring in bed, having picnics in bed, and snuggling while watching "Pwincess Foggy" (interpretation: The Princess Frog) for the 500th time. She says that "mommy has a booboo"...that seems to make sense to her. Hopefully she won't think the babies are a "booboo" when they get here. Ha!

Speaking of my sweet little love...this is what happens when mommy is on bed rest and grandaddy lets her pick out her own outfit...

She gets her sense of style from her daddy.

Dear Ella,

Your laughter, sense of humor, and love have seen me through many long hours the past couple weeks. You have adapted to all this change so well. I look forward to the cool fall breeze and watching the leaves change colors and fall from the trees with you. Although life will be busy with the three of you, I know that you and I will once again hold hands through the park, swing on the swings, and read "Alice in Wonderland" (your favorite book right now!) again. When the leaves fall, know that I will be waiting to jump in the leaves with you...hand in hand.

Mommy